I just can’t seem to…look away. I’ve been staring at this for so long, I’ve lost track of all space and time and my brain feels like it’s leaking out my ears.

Is it…is it possible to be so ugly that you emit static electricity? That appears to be what’s happening here.

Friday has been covered by all manner of people from random YouTubers to Stephen Colbert. But out of those, I think this is probably the best effort yet.

Sure, the rooster isn’t human, but somehow he’s able to capture what made Rebecca Black’s original track so memorable.

Believe you me I know that pictures of sexy sports fans is nothing new.  That doesn’t mean it will ever go out of favor.   Granted some fans are a little bit sexier than others but I think we can all agree that the world would be a better place if the ladies dressed up in gear like this when they attended sporting events.

Check out these great sports outfits after the jump…..

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Let’s face it, Japan’s been through an awful lot in the last year so I’m hardly here to make fun of the country.  In fact I’m here to praise it as I always have.   If there’s one country I’ve respected for its creativity it’s been Japan.

Honestly I don’t know how the hell these guys come up with some of the media they do.   Granted a ton of it makes zero sense to me but who cares?  It’s incredibly entertaining.

In that light, here are seven more Japanese commercials that make no sense to me…..

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Click on the photo for more future lower back problems

The folks over at The Chive have come up with a funny way of describing bigger than normal chest size.   They like to say these women will have future lower back problems.   Sure, make sense to me.

More things that make sense at Uncoached’s Facebook Page

The Throwdown

Reasons why there are so many Jews in comedy – [Cracked]

Seven awesome videos of the Philly Phanatic – [Unathletic]

Megan Fox is definitely still relevant – [FHM]

When you need celebrity cleavage – [Taxidrivermovie] (NSFW Ads)

You never know where that finger’s been – [Attuworld]

Jesus Christ Janice Dickinson, close em up – [Celebslam]

This baby has got some serious issues – [Cityrag]

Eleven people you always see at the beach – [Guyism]

Six documentaries that are highly informative – [COED Magazine]

Tila Tequila is the original Snooki – [Don Chavez]

Pictures from the construction of the Titanic – [Nedhardy]

Fifteen people with impressive arrest records – [Popcrunch]

They are small but they can kick your ass – [Izismile]

Pictures of people falling off bikes – [Banned in Hollywood]

Ten life lessons learned from cartoons – [Gunaxin]

Check out the latest sexy girl next door – [Bullz-Eye]

Female murderers you’d have gone home with – [Holytaco]

Click on the photo for more hotties in the wild

You know what time it is folks!  It’s that time of the week where you are looking at some girls that you’ve never seen before.  The kind that you actually have a shot at.   Well, maybe not this one but hopefully someday right?  Right?

More girls you wish you had at Uncoached’s Facebook Page

The Portfolio

Amazingly enough we’ve already featured this guy on one of our other sites Unreality.   Turns out he gets these insane Neytiri tattoos by the month.  I think he’s slowed down his pace lately but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t stopped collecting or decorating.

Now the dude has an entire truck decorated in Neytiri not to mention a vanity plate with her name.   Not exactly a tough looking truck anymore is it…

Get a life buddy.  Pictures after the jump….

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I doubt you guys would know Ashley Scheibenpflug by name but perhaps you won’t forget it now dude to the crazy spelling.   She was featured in the 2009-2010 Tempe12 calendar as Ms. September.  She was also marketing major at Arizona State University and even tried out for the Phoenix Suns dance team.

According to now she works as a manager at a clothing store in Nebraska.   Whatever small town that is needs someone to swoop in there and get Ashley on the set immediately.

More of Ashley after the jump….

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Very rarely do you ever get to see a real life miracle caught on video, but that’s what’s happened today as the power of the promise of drunkenness has cured this woman’s disability in order to allow her to reach the booze.

Let’s hope she uses her newfound legs for good, and not just to stumble around getting drunk. It’s probably safer to be in a wheelchair in that state.