. Uncoached - Stuff Males Wish They Could Do in Public |

Jun 01 2011

5 Things A Male Wished He Could Do Without Consequence

Published by at 7:20 am under Editorial

Do you realize how frustrating it is to hold in a burp or a fart day after day and night after night when you’re in public?  I mean it’s just not fair right?  Us guys have a ton of responsibility out there.

It’s enough that we gotta get out there, work every day, bring home the bills and we can’t even relax with our hands in our pants?  Not cool.  Not cool at all.  There are some thing we just wish were universally accepted which unfortunately are not.

Here are five such things…..

Have Sex with Another Woman

This is a given but it had to mentioned.   Think about it folks.   The grass is always greener right?  Everyone, including women, want what they don’t have.  And when they get what they want, they don’t want it anymore.  It’s a sick game that nature plays on us but it will exist until the end of time.   So men wanting more women than they have is no surprise but again, I had to at least bring it up.

Not Work at All

While we know we have to go to work and make a living and all that, wouldn’t it be nice to just not show up and it not be a big deal?  Seriously, how cool would that be?  Kind of like the movie “Office Space.”   By the way has anyone ever tried this?   Have any of you seen how far you can take it in terms of slacking off before you actually got fired?  It’d be a nice experiment.

Bodily Functions Anywhere and Anytime

Granted there are some pretty disgusting dudes out there who really don’t care (and I salute you) for the most part we guys are pretty well behaved in public situations.   So it kind of sucks that when you have to rip a loud one or burp that you’re really not supposed to do that.  I mean I guess in front of your guy friends but who cares about that?

“Girly” or Sensitive Stuff

There’s a big stigma out there about guys being guys.  Hell you see it every day in the media.  Dudes are made fun of if they’re too neat, care too much how they look, or do anything remotely sensitive.  Unless you’re homosexual then it seems you have to be a man’s man which just isn’t the reality of who guys are.   We have feelings man!

Open to Suggestion

Honestly I can’t think of something definitive here so I leave it to those reading this to add their opinion.  The winning slot will be added.   Good luck folks!



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