. Uncoached - Strippers Are Lying To You |

Mar 03 2011

The Five Biggest Lies Strippers Tell You

Published by at 7:20 am under Editorial

I gotta say I’m not a big strip club type of a guy.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy seeing attractive women who don’t have clothes on but the whole lap dance and seduction thing kind of weirds me out.  Some guys are the aggressive loser types that drool and try to actually get the women who dance for them.

Whereas as I’m always the awkward loser guy who isn’t comfortable at all.   It’s a fun scene but I just can’t take too much of it.  Also, if you don’t watch yourself you can leave a place like that without a pot to piss in.  Why?

Because of the lies you are getting from strippers…..

“This is My First Week Dancing”

You’re sitting there with a hard on the size of Chicago because of the grinding session you just had and oh yeah, it’s her first week on the job.  Strippers will want you to believe they’re not comfortable doing this and that their real lives are meaningful and special.   Why?  Because then you might have a shot with her right?  Wrong.

“I Never Give Free Dances but There’s Something About You”

The way it goes is you pay for one dance, and she does her thing. When the dance is over, you go your separate ways. But every now and then, she detects a sucker and hits him pretty hard.  After the freebie, said sucker will be paying for dance after dance until well, there is no more pockets.  During the lap dance while he’s thinking abouta new life with the stripper she’s thinking  “I really need to do my nails.” Listen carefully: She doesn’t want you.

“I Just do this on the Side for Fun”

They’ll try to tell you that full time they’re real estate agents, accountants, etc. Why? Because the guy doesn’t think he can nail a stripper. He’s capable of nailing a real estate agent, though right?  Trust me, they do this full time.  If they could be a full time accountant they probably would.  You don’t just half ass stripping.

“You are So Cute!”

I’m pretty sure that I’m the best looking guy in the world every time I go to a strip club.  No really, I am!

“You can do whatever you want in the private room”

Guys, don’t ever ever get suckered into going into a private room.  I have never been roped into it before and will never be roped into that in the foreseeable future.  From what I’ve heard it’s just a ton of money for nothing much more.

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