Um, let’s call it five minutes in the box for gang-rape? And people call rugby the most homoerotic sport.

Just kidding, I do love hockey as outside of rugby, it’s the most violent sport out there. I guess homoeroticism and violence go together.  But seriously, in what other sport is straight-up fist fighting grounds for a few minute penalty rather than a multi-game suspension? And then there’s the acts of sodomy like you see here? What other sport has that?

Err, I think that’s probably happened in pro football a few times by accident.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sp8ttwikTEs&feature=player_embedded

I’m not sure I remember ever seeing a whole lot of adds for fruit before because it’s well, fruit, and it’s not really going anywhere, but I guess they have to advertise for it in Japan so the population doesn’t die of scurvy.

What you see above is a Japanese ad for Dole bananas, and it’s about as WTF as any banana commercial ever could be. But really, were you honestly expecting anything less?

I’m surprised he didn’t bust out the “peanut butter jelly time” dance at the end there.

Did anyone go to the AVN awards this year?  I feel like that’s about the only time you’ll ever get to see a porn star not take their clothes off.  Kind of annoying if you ask me.  But at the same time it’s a chance for you to see these women outside of their professions which is basically tricking you into believing that they truly enjoy taking on 16 guys anally.

But these ladies have lives outside of their “work” just like any of us do.  It’s kind of strange to think about but it’s true.  So when they’re not in girl on girl action or having ninesomes they’re out drinking, partying and having a grand old time like the rest of us.

Here are 15 “private” pictures of porn stars.  See if you can figure out who they are.

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Ever since “Awkward Family Photos” came out I’ve been drawn to these nutty pictures.   It’s not so much the pictures that’s crazy, it’s the stories behind them.  I mean think about it.  I was raised in Long Island in an upper middle class family.  There are ZERO awkward family pictures.

I mean not a thing looks wacky.  Sure we’ve made weird faces and stuff but you know what I mean.  But when the photos you are about to see are “normal” for these folks?  Well then you know there’s some weird shit going on with these people.

I can’t even possibly begin to analyze this.  Bottom line, look at these people…

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Click on the photo for more girls in hot tubs

Hot tubs are responsible for getting more dudes laid than the Serta Mattress. The capability of the jacuzzi to get girls naked surpasses any other invention currently known to man.  Why?  Alcohol and blood thinning that’s why.

More blood thinning chicks at Uncoached’s Facebook Page

The Throwdown

Five reasons you should be very afraid of Google – [Cracked]

In an depth look at the women of Peter Pan – [Collegehumor]

Kid takes down not one but two bullies when they mess with him – [Linkiest]

The sexiest bottle of water picture of all time – [Ehowa]

When you need a fix of celebrity slips – [Taxidrivermovie] (NSFW Ads)

Putting price tags in really really funny places – [Manofest]

Weekly compilation of fap worthy pictures – [Cavemancircus]

Twenty five sexy girls wearing daisy dukes – [Holytaco]

When hot girls show off their flexibility – [COED Magazine]

Committing chatroulette suicide is not fun – [Attuworld]

You do not want to mess with the Kung Fu bear – [DJ Mick]

Mixing Big Lebowski and McGyver is pretty funny – [Heavy]

Don’t piss off a deer or this will happen to you – [Regretfulmorning]

Emmanuelle Chriqui in her underwear – [Don Chavez]

Hilarity will ensue when seeing some of these videos – [OMG Blog]

Lindsay Lohan’s latest lesbian lover – [Cityrag]

What happened to the sweet and innocent Kendra? – [Flisted]

A close look at the Nascar WAGs hall of fame – [Bleacherreport]

Adriana Lima is back in a big way – [Heymanhustle]

Click on the photo for more hotties in the wild

Over the hump day!  That’s right kiddies.  It’sWednesday.   Know what that means?  It means it’s time to start thinking about the weekend and your chance to have a very unsafe drunken sexual experience that you will regret later in life.  But enjoy it now!

More regrets recorded at Uncoached’s Facebook Page

The Portfolio

I’m a big meat eater.  I ain’t gonna lie and I’m not going to sugar coat it.  It’s a fact of life.  I love a good steak.  I’m keen on chicken and I simply cannot see myself not eating meat.  That doesn’t mean that I don’t care about animals.   But if it means taking out some cows then I’m sorry to say that that’s what it means.

It doesn’t mean I don’t applaud the efforts of societies like the WWF.  They sure as hell know how to get their point across.  Put it this way.  If it’s an animal in a zoo?  I get it.  If it’s your own pet?  I understand.   But when it comes to the food chain, I gotta eat.

In any event, here are 10 creative ads constructed by the WWF.

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Christ, I forgot Pauly Shore and Stephen Baldwin were in a movie together. How did that not spark the apocalypse?

Anyway, the real story. Six volunteers are about to be locked up in a 1,000 square foot module in Russia to simulate what a mission to Mars would be like, and if they would go insane and murder each other or possibly…fall in love.

There are three Russians, two Europeans and one Chinese guy. This sounds like the lead up to a joke. I hope the Chinese guy can speak Russian or English…

“It will be trying for all of us. We cannot see our family, we cannot see our friends, but I think it is all a glorious time in our lives,” enthused Chinese participant Wang Yue, who is the youngest volunteer at age 27.

“We don’t wash them. When the clothes are dirty we throw them out — out to outer space,” he said laughing, adding the crew would only get to shower once every ten days.

“It will be tough. A year and half is not a small thing. It is a very long time, but we are building a team for each other to help the one who is down,” he said.

What if they open the hatch at the end and it’s just the Chinese guy sitting there in a pool of blood with everyone else daed? “Ta-da! I won!” I’d watch that movie. Err, wait, what is this all for again?

Honestly I’m having a hard time even coming up with words about Laura Michelle Prestin.   Allow me to explain.  I actually think it’s painful to look at a female this perfect.  Seriously it like, makes me angry.   I could go out, win a billion dollars in a lottery, see this chick, know that I don’t have her at this very moment and want to kill myself.

Seriously dudes.  What in God’s name would you do with a female of this caliber?  Could you even imagine?  I really don’t think I can.  It’s chicks like this that make dudes turn into serial killers.  Seriously.

Laura, if you’re reading this I just want to say how much I hate and love you at the same time.

More of Ms. Prestin after the jump

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