When it snows on your car it sucks.  When it rains on your car and it gets all dirty even though you cleaned it the day before, it sucks.    When some little punk kid decides to key your door, it sucks.

However, when a bunch of caterpillars decide to set up camp right around your car, it’s beyond sucking.  It’s to the point where I think I would simply say “it’s time to get a new car.”

This has got to be one of the worst things that can happen to any car…

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It’s a fairly typical question for a school newspaper to impose on its students, “If you could be famous for anything, what would you be famous for?” It’s a way of asking about their goals and dreams and what they hope to accomplish in life after graduation.

Well in Spokane Valley, the kids have a different set of goals. Their responses?

“Killing someone famous”

“Mass murder”

“Having an affair with the President”

“Dropping a nuke on the Middle East”

“Being leader of the KKK”

And since administrators don’t read the paper before it’s published, these all went to print, which is why you’re reading this story now. They’re now investigating whether this was some elaborate prank, or if they’ve really got a batch of messed up kids on their hands.

I don’t know much about Jenn Anh Nguyen but I know she lives in Pennsylvania and has appeared in Playboy before.   Seriously other than that I have absolutely nothing.  And when I say that I refer to this fact more so than any other article I’ve ever written on this site.

At least before I could refer to a favorite color or make some wisecrack remark about what country the girl is from.  Here?  I don’t have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of.  I am nothing.  I know nothing.  I want nothing.

Well, not nothing.  I’m pretty sure I’d want Ms. Nguyen.

More of Jenn after the jump

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I don’t know how this is the first time I’ve seen a picture of someone doing this ever, but this guy is some kind of beer genius to come up with a homemade waterfall like this.

I guarantee, the next time I’m drunk enough, I’m going to try this, and due to my lackluster hand-eye coordination, will likely end up dropping four beers instead of drinking them.

However, if you CAN pull it off, I guarantee the bartender will give you these four drinks, and probably four more for free.

God, you have to love local news, with their pieces about cat fashion shows and warnings that your breakfast cereal MIGHT BE KILLING YOU.

But what’s better than local news? Australian local news, which produces gems like this guy, recounting a dog that went crazy on him.

Even with the hyperbolic YouTube video title, I still was in no way prepared for what I was about to witness. I really can’t describe it other than to say you just really need to watch it. Brace yourself.

The weather might be getting warmer and I might be getting happier but that doesn’t mean there are times when I think about the cold weather.  And trust me it’s not as though I miss the cold.  But if the cold does bring us one thing, it’s the chance of seeing things that are out of ordinary.  What I mean is, you rarely see people barely clothed when it’s really cold out.

And who would have know that on my birthday earlier this year, that Lebanon would be putting on a full out Ski and Lingerie fashion show at the Mzaar Ski Resort?

If I hadn’t come across the beautiful pictures I wouldn’t have known it myself.

Check out the lovely lingerie greatness at this festival after the jump

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It’s every guy’s dream while at a strip club.  It’s also every guy’s complete idiotic delusion.  “Oh she’s definitely into me.”  “She’s giving me her number!”  “I’m so getting laid.”  No.  No you’re not.  You have absolutely zero chance at having sex with the strippers at the strip club you are currently visiting.

I’m still amazed that so many guys get sucked into this stuff.  Fellas, they are doing their jobs.  They are there to make money.  They are not there to blow you, have sex with you, or call you a dick.  They are there to be nice, strip, and make money.  That is all.  So while you think these woman dig you, they don’t.

However, I’m here to rescue all you guys from your wallets.  If you really want to have sex with a hot stripper, here are the five realistic ways you will accomplish this feat…

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Click on the photo for more of Amanda Carrier’s fitness body

There are big husky fitness chicks and then there are those that remain quite feminine.  And I’m not talking about the chicks that just get implants.  Some women still have that cutie piece face coupled with a ridiculous rack that could break you.  Say hi to Amanda Carrier.

More fitness hotties at Uncoached’s Facebook Page

The Funbag

Most Americans lose their virginity in their teens – [Asylum]

The most creepy serial killers (who were animals) – [Cracked]

The Showgirls on Blu Ray cover is worth a look – [OMG Blog]

Need a celebrity “slip” or two?  Go here – [Taxidrivermovie] (NSFW Ads)

Conan O’Brien is back and this video is awesome – [Heavy]

Ashley Dupre is in Playboy! (NSFW Pics) – [Brobible]

What would Jesus say to Paris Hilton? – [Imgbit]

The sexiest alphabet picture you’ll ever see – [Ehowa]

Chicks licking ice cream cones?  I’m in – [Attuworld]

Hot girl does a body shot…and fails – [Regretfulmorning]

Busty girls that make their friends invisible – [NS4W]

North Korean comedy is much funnier than you think – [Nedhardy]

Check out these celebrities without makeup – [Ace]

Entourage is really only about chicks in bikinis – [Atom]

One of the best celebrity photobombs ever – [Celebrityodor]

Guy slaps random stranger and pays for it dearly – [Linkiest]

Renee Lacombe deserves your undivided attention – [Sublime Blog]

A Lovely gallery of sexy party girls – [EgoTV]

Click on the photo for more hotties in the wild

It’s that time of the week.  You know that time where you think about the weekend?  It’s coming folks.  And it’s up to you guys to have the balls to get out there and meet these women.  They’re out there.  The same girls as in this picture.  And they’re ready.  Are you?

More girls to be ready for at Uncoached’s Facebook Page

The Portfolio