Apr 16 2010
It’s every guy’s dream while at a strip club. It’s also every guy’s complete idiotic delusion. “Oh she’s definitely into me.” “She’s giving me her number!” “I’m so getting laid.” No. No you’re not. You have absolutely zero chance at having sex with the strippers at the strip club you are currently visiting.
I’m still amazed that so many guys get sucked into this stuff. Fellas, they are doing their jobs. They are there to make money. They are not there to blow you, have sex with you, or call you a dick. They are there to be nice, strip, and make money. That is all. So while you think these woman dig you, they don’t.
However, I’m here to rescue all you guys from your wallets. If you really want to have sex with a hot stripper, here are the five realistic ways you will accomplish this feat…
You spend tons of Money
Let’s be realistic here. Your average Joe has about zero shot at actually getting laid at a strip club. However, if you have a super amount of money to spend then you just never know. Clearly the champagne room is your best shot but honestly fellas, you’re looking at probably 5 grand or even more just to do what you probably could if you got drunk enough and hit on some ugly chick. I mean is it really worth it? Probably not.
You Own the Strip Club
Dare I say “testing” the merchandise? I’m sure, in fact positive there are some seedy ass strip clubs out there where some under the table dirty deeds are done between employee and boss. Not that I’d ever want to be a part of that but like I said, there has to be plenty of instances of this around.
You Too Are a Hot Stripper
Ain’t nothing wrong with a little mixing of business and pleasure. Oh and I’m referring to female strippers so fellas, don’t get any ideas here.
You are a Celebrity (Actor or Rock Star or Athlete)
This kind of falls in line with the money thing but not all famous people are rich. And if you happen to be famous a stripper might very well use her sexual powers to try and get herself into the limelight as well.
You Get Extremely Lucky at That Particular Moment
I’ve seen it happen. You just never know. Maybe once or twice a year all of us experience moments that are too good to be true. So with the right moment and timing, you just might find a stripper at her most vulnerable moments where she feels like giving you a little more than just a lap dance.
Even More Uncoachable Stuff
- The Five Biggest Lies Strippers Tell You
- They’re Really Bridging the Gap Between Strip Clubs and Car Shows
- The Myspace Toolbox: Chippendale Wishes Douche TJ
- Tampa Strip Clubs Lead the PM Portfolio
- The 8 People You Don’t Want to Meet at a Strip Club