It’s a natural reaction.  An erection.  Yes I’ll use the word again, “erection.”  Don’t be embarrassed.  It’s a perfectly natural function of the human body.  Most of us guys call it a boner, or chubby, or 1700 other nicknames for it.  We’ve been trained to hide these boners at times where we shouldn’t have them.

I say why?  What would be more glorious than a boner being an accepted look here in the U.S.?  I would love being able to flaunt my boneage.  But as it stands, I doubt society will change much soon.

And until that happens, the inopportune time boner is going to exist.  Yes it’s funny and yes I have pictures.

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Click on the photo for Megan Fox sex sounds

We all know that Megan Fox has said some pretty ridiculous things – things that are so absurd, they’ve actually made her less hot (yes, it’s possible). But instead of focusing on the negative (this time), COED’s put together the Megan Fox Sex Soundboard.

More sexy girls at Uncoached’s Facebook Group

The Madness

Obnoxious Douchebags who show up at every concert – [Cracked]

Seven studies that can help you get laid – [Asylum]

Delfina Gerez Bosco is ridiculously hot – [Doubleviking]

Kim Kardashian looking unreal in her bikini – [NS4W]

Yo Gotti, there ain’t no relation – [Smoking Section]

Check out the hot chick golf trick – [Nextround]

Katie Price gets pumped (her boobs I mean) – [Don Chavez]

Cheryl Tweedy is by far the hottest WAG ever – [Epic Carnival]

Jessica Simpson’s big boobs and golf – [The Grumpiest]

Teacher sends out sex tap DVD by mistake – [Totally Crap]

Christopher Street day is one messed up day – [Attuworld]

So you know, babies love boobs too – [Manofest]

Just in case you missed the gigantic funbag fest – [Funtasticus]

Um, this picture is NOT going to end well – [Tastybooze]

Taking a look at Heath Shuler’s proxy – [Losers with Socks]

I never want to grow up – [The Chive]

9 Unintentionally Gay Rap Album covers – [The Rap Up]

Some incredibly hot chick named Audrey – [Bullzeye]

The newest series of “Hot Sluts” – [Atom]

Some things in life just aren’t fair.

Submit your captions to me.

I will be the first to tell you that I’m a Yankees fan and always will be.  But do I ever see this kind of stuff in New York?  The answer is a definitive “no.”

I understand that the Yankees are supposed to be this “classy” organization.  But come on.  You can always “Blame it on the Rain.”  This makes me really like Papelboner and Delcarmen.

By the way, can we just exile Michael Kay to some deserted island please?  Get the Mets guys to come over to YES.

Looks like I didn’t luck out this year.  It would have been nice if July 4th fell on a weekday so I could just put up one of those posts that says “Happy July 4th, I’ll be back tomorrow.”  Now I actually have to keep doing work.  I find that pretty annoying.

But whatever.  If anyone is reading this, I hope you’re on a beach somewhere with a ton of guidos who are really pissing you off.

I know that’s where I probably am right now.

In the meantime, enjoy these patriotic hotties

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Click on the photo for more of that stuff

But hey, what the hell?  It’s July 4th.  I’m outside right now in Connecticut not hitting on young girls in this little town I’m at.  OK Dear?  Since no one is reading this I just want to say that I love you all and that I haven’t masturbated in almost a week.

Masturbation material at Uncoached’s Facebook Group

The Wash

The Top Celebrity Free Agents AKA Hot Women – [Extramustard]

Amazing failures in TV Show Auditions – [Cracked]

Celtics seeking dancers with cleavage – [Bustedcoverage]

Are you kidding me ass of Camille Holbrooke? – [Gorillamask]

Another fine edition of Hotties in the Wild – [Doubleviking]

It was Thursday night’s chick fight – [Withleather]

Failed kids cereal breakfast boxes – [Holytaco]

A nice roundup of patriotic tattoos – [Asylum]

The Ten coolest human bug flicks – [Gunaxin]

A new reporter decides to slap a drunk guy – [EJB]

What the hell is this?  Roller Babies? – [Attuworld]

The best of girls holding boobs – [HGOM]

Sexy Playboy girl Katie Anderson – [NS4W] )(ink to NSFW)

What the hell is the Incredible Mini-Hulk? – [Manofest]

The Megan Fox of ’04 Vs. The Megan Fox of ’09 – [The Chive]

Stewie Reacts to two girls and one cup – [Celebrity Odor]

The Pornstar twit of the day – [Don Chavez]

Michelle Hunziker is ridiculous in her bikini again – [On205th]

A collection of awesome pics from this week – [Funtasticus]

An unbelievable gallery of a mansion – [DJ Mick]

Click on the photo for more of stuff like that

All of us bloggers have it.  I have the PM Portfolio.  Other guys have their versions of it.  But bottom line, all of us gather up wonderful woman each day so you guys sitting in your cubicles can dream of a life that isn’t there.  Aren’t we nice?

More dreaming at Uncoached’s Facebook Group

The Portfolio

So for all you ladies out there who love Nick Jonas.  Just remember one thing.  He looks a hell of a lot like the dude from Young Sherlock Holmes (whose name also happens to be Nicholas, Nicholas Rowe that is).

And while that might kind of look like a cutie pie picture of Jonas holding a pipe, this is what Rowe looks like now.

So just remember that when you’re trying to get Nick to take off that virgin ring or whatever the hell thing he wears.  He just might try to corn cob pipe you up the ass or something.

More pictures

I don’t care if Collien Fernandes is posing in these pictures or not.  You can just tell that this girl “loves it.”  I don’t know exactly what it is but there’s an incredible aura about her.

It’s the kind of aura where she’d be the type of girl who would say “your wife? you’re here with me now.  let’s do this.”  I don’t know man. I can picture her in just cowboy boots giving me a very dirty look while hunched over a bed in a bent over crouch.  Nah, I don’t have problems.

Then again, what do I know?  She’s from Hamburg.

I love Hamburg after the jump

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