Jul 15 2009
From the NY Daily News yesterday:
Lance Armstrong remains within striking distance of the yellow jersey following the 10th stage of the Tour de France on Tuesday, a 121-mile ride from Limoges to Issoudun won by British cyclist Mark Cavendish following a sprint finish over the final 200 yards.
Cavendish edged Thor Hushovd of Norway to collect his third stage victory, and American Tyler Farrar finished third, but the stage had little impact on the overall standings.
So basically here’s how it’s gonna go down. During the final stages of the race Lance will have some sort of leg cramp and or “ailment” that will enable him to have to stop.
Then he’ll make sure to get a drink on the side of the road. While getting a drink a “fan” will accidentally bump into him somehow injecting him with an unregistered amount of horse hormones.
Armstrong will then win the race by about 6 days and people will always talk about his memorable comeback. He’ll test positive 3 weeks after winning the crown. He’ll be ridiculed, retire, and then come back when he’s 46 only to repeat this exact process all over again.
Even More Uncoachable Stuff