Not only do iphones make your calls, take your pictures, drive your car, cook your breakfast and pleasure you in the sack, they are platforms for creating beautiful masterpieces.

Is there going to be such things as pen and paper?  Will there ever be a need for something without a button?  I guess we just have to roll with the times huh?

Well, here are some pretty interesting pieces of art made with an iphone.

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Yup, I’m 100% excited for white substances to be spit all over me.  I’m prepared for all the shit, poop, piss, wiping, bathing, picking things out, anything they can throw at me.

OK actually I’m not even close to ready.  People volunteer to do this stuff?  It’s amazing.  If you had a questionnaire that said all the stuff babies do, I just can’t see myself saying “yes, I want a baby.”

Just the vomiting alone would prohibit a “yes.”

While I’d love to know the entire life story of Nadejda (I assume pronounced Nadya) Lambreva I don’t understand a lick of Bulgarian.  And it seems that most of the clippings and what not on her involve a language that doesn’t say “breasts flopping on teddy bears.”

And if you’re looking for photos of this little vixen then the most you’ll find is of her flippies breezing in the wind topless with a teddy bear from a June 2009 Maxim shoot.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.  Nothing at all.

Pictures after the jump

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What is there some hip hop town in Connecticut?  Is there some sort of “awww shit yo” culture that I’m not aware of up north?  Can someone please explain this to me?

Otherwise I have no clue what “Elite” is talking about.  Do you have a name son?  Yeah I said son.  What of it yo?

Good God who are these people?

Coming off the most recent news about Michael Phelps I had a couple of thoughts on the matter.  For those that don’t know.

Olympic gold medal winner Michael Phelps has written a book. The children’s book titled “How To Train with a T. Rex and Win 8 Gold Medals” is a collaboration with illustrator Ward Jenkins for the picture book that encourages children to exercise and work toward a goal.

While I’m certain that Phelps will be receiving his fair share of criticism on this matter, I have my own opinions.  If I were Phelps I’d probably be leading a very similar life as him.

Think about it.  You grow up and have incredibly awful gums.  Your teeth are a mess and you’re clearly a huge dork.  But you have a talent, an athletic talent, despite a wacky jawline that’s much better suited to play World of Warcraft.

But you get older and all of a sudden your athletic skills bring you to the Olympics.  You’re gotten zero women in your life.  In fact you were probably made fun of save the fact that you were an incredible swimmer.  You have all this pent up energy and motivation to succeed and say “dammit I’m NOT a dork and I can get chicks!.”  So you win the damned Olympics and in ridiculous fashion.  You realize that now your dreams have become a reality.

Well, Phelps is about the biggest example of this dream in history.  So smoking weed (on occasion), going to strip clubs, banging ridiculously hot women,  eating like 10 meals a day, and gosh darnet writing a children’s book with a T-Rex isn’t really a surprise is it?

Isn’t that what you’d do?

Guy is just livin’ the dream man.  Nicely done Mr. Phelps.  Now hook me up with Theresa White.

Love that chick.

It all began with Beverly Hills 90210.  It’s the prime time soap show.  You know, those shows that make you 100% dumber but as a female you have to watch for the latest fashion trends, lingo, and drama.

As a male you have to watch for the hot chicks.  Oh yeah, you also have to watch for the latest fashion trends, lingo, and drama.  Admit it dudes, you get into these shows too.  It’s fun to get out of life for an hour and let yourself get immersed in the stupidity of lives we’ll never lead.

That or I can just read a book.

But if you’ve followed any of these shows you’ll know hot women come often.  And here are 15 that I think are worth mentioning

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While the divorce rate sits at 53% I’m sure as hell hoping I don’t have to go through the motions again in my lifetime.  Lord knows it’s hard enough planning a wedding and dealing with all that bullshit.

But never in my wildest dreams could I imagine that my current wife would actually say “no” when I got down on one knee.  How does this happen?  I just can’t imagine it.

I can only think that these guys who do these kinds of proposals are dumb.  I mean did the girls even say they loved these guys?  How do you not know a girl is going to say “no?”  I just find it hard to believe.

Well, these five videos are some pretty embarrassing proof.

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Click on the photo for more of Kournikova

Anna Kournikova recently did a photoshoot for In Style Magazine.  So that got me thinking.  How fast did this girl just stop playing tennis?  Amazing.  I mean I don’t have a problem with it or anything.  Actually I do.  Try hard at a sport.  Unless she does porn then I just don’t care.

More hot athletes at Uncoached’s Facebook Group

Or you can follow me on twitter

The Wash

The USA vs. Italy model showdown – [COED Magazine]

Save your genital from stressfull sitting – [Asylum]

Candid pictures of Megan Fox are just as good – [Usemycomputer]

Rosie Jones has the perfect 34C’s – [EJB]

The days hot chicks and other wacky stuff – [Takeareport]

Pictures of girls holding their own boobs – [HGOM]

Jennifer Aniston’s cans in tin foil – [The Grumpiest]

What the hell is going on with Johan Santana? – [Sharapova's Thigh]

This is what you call “boobs for beer” – [Ehowa]

15 Pictures of massive joints – [Cityrag]

Jessica White is a wild chick because she’s on a beach – [Attuworld]

Interview with Hot Chicks with Douchebags creator – [Spike]

A Terrible Wiping Stick commercial – [Today's Big Thing]

Delivering Mail goes XXX – [Atom]

It’s always nice to watch Shauna Sand get a tan – [Don Chavez]

Never put a firecracker in your ass and light it – [DJ Mick]

Tim Sylvia got knocked out pretty badly – [Withleather]

Tori Black is unbelievably sexy – [Sublime Blog]

Check out the new comfort wipe technology – [Gunaxin]

Dealing with competition from other dudes – [Bullzeye]

Click on the photo for more Terrie Barr

26-year-old Terrie Barr calls the Lone Star State home. This Houston hottie has a very impressive resume having been a promotional model for Maxim, Playboy, Blender, Hawaiian Tropic and many others.

More Playboy types at Uncoached’s Facebook Group

The Portfolio