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Jun 09 2009

Some Real Reasons Why David Ortiz Sucks This Year

Published by at 4:40 am under MLB

David Ortiz

David Ortiz finally hit a bomb the other day but let’s face it, there’s something severely wrong with the guy.  I find it quite interesting that no one has yet brought up steroids as a possible reason.  I’d have to assume that most people are thinking it but wouldn’t it at least be logical?

It’s not like Ortiz is 40 years old.  Even he’s said so himself.   So the bottom line is that something has to be wrong with the guy.  And as fantasy owners wait for the man to turn it all around for some kind of miracle rest of the season, we’re all trying to figure out what the hell this dude’s real problem is.

Well I’ve come up with some pretty legit reasons as to why Ortiz is screwing up on a consistent basis this year.

He might want to read this.

David Ortiz

It’s not the two chicks kissing David.  It’s that guy below.  He’s one shady cat but that’s Ortiz’s he pimp.

David Ortiz

Wrong sport buddy.  Stop playing hoops after games.

David Ortiz

I mean how obvious is this?

David Ortiz

Fanny packs was a very bad decision in the off season.

David Ortiz

Dude.  Come on buddy.  Gotta tie those shoes.

David Ortiz

Manny!  Ortiz needs Manny.





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