Being a closer in Major League Baseball sure as hell ain’t what it used to be.  Nowadays some guys get 10 figure deals in the offseason and are valued way too highly.  Plus, and I could be wrong here, I feel like saves are a joke these days and back in the 70′s, 80′s and even early 90′s a closer really “closed” a game.  You got a one run lead, a tough lineup coming up, and you really need to earn it.

Now you got a three run lead and it’s automatically time to put in the closer.   Guy gives up two runs and still earns the save? It’s just boring and pathetic if you ask me.  Plus, where’s the flare in our guys today?  I mean where’s the excitement on the mound?

Is Julian Tavarez the only psycho reliever left out there?  And he’s not even a closer.  Eh whatever.  Point is, I just miss some of these guys.

Here are seven closers we need back in MLB

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Click on the photo for more of Kagney and other boobs

I have a feeling I’m going to be into Kagney Linn Carter for at least 24 hours.  And you have to admit that’s pretty impressive.  Not to mention the fact that I’m not even into blonds.  OK that’s all I got.

More blonds at Uncoached’s Facebook Group

Or you can follow me on Twitter

The Wash

Awesome interview with pornstar Sasha Grey – [Holytaco]

Kylie Minogue has a very interesting new costume – [OMG Blog]

The latest edition of “Hotties in the Wild’ – [Doubleviking]

A practical guide for Sexting (for men over 30) – [Cracked]

Is 2009 the year of the white guy in the NBA? – [Withleather]

A Terminator spoof with happy endings – [Atom]

Tara Reid shows her can at Cannes – [Cityrag]

The Slumdog Price is Right (this is hilarious) – [Collegehumor]

I’d like to get a lot closer to Paula Morales – [On205th]

Simona Ventura has a bit of a “slip” moment on stage – [Cameltap]

China’s new sex themed park finished prematurely – [Asylum]

An All around fun gallery of hot chicks – [Theospark]

One man.  One dream.  One chance – [Blog of Hilarity]

Now this is the true video of “Dancing Queen” – [Attuworld]

The Walken Intervention – [Flabber]

Hayden Panettiere bikini candids in Cannes – [NS4W]

TiGli – what kind of name is that?  She’s still hot though – [Flisted]

Six white guys, a truck, and a basketball – [Gunaxin]

Commuters in swimwear take over Manhattan – [Nextround]

Click on the photo for more Annette Dawn

Voluptuous pin-up vixen Anette Dawn is a glamour/nude model from Budapest, Hungary. In addition to running her own Website, Anette has shown off her wicked figure in magazines around the world. Which is just proof that the only true international language is the language of boobs…

More international language at Uncoached’s Facebook Group

The Portfolio

I for one am not a big fan of the Roller Coaster ride.  I think my relationship with my wife is enough.  Ba dum ching!  Man I’m amazing.  Seriously though, I’ve always gotten nauseous at the thought of the free fall and the stomach losing itself.   That doesn’t mean that I don’t get a kick out of other people though.

It’s pretty damned funny to see people both on a roller coaster and then their reactions after the ride is over.  It’s not often you get to see people screaming for their lives…well that’s unless they’re at a Jonas Brothers concert.  Ba dum ching!  Wow I’m on fire right now.

OK here are funny roller coaster ride pictures

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This is the same dude who’s in the classic “Best Fight Scene Ever” clip that everyone posts.  I guess this is considered a rape scene or something?  But it’s not.  This is the dude’s girlfriend.

Wait until you see what this guy is thinking about while “making love” to this chick.  And then she cries?  Honestly I don’t know what this is but I think it’s funny?

Is it?  I need some feedback here.   The clip is from a movie called Undefeatable.  By the way this brilliant actor’s real name is Don Niam.

Honestly I couldn’t think of better adjectives for Arielle Kebbel than “fun” and “cutesy.”  She just has that look where I’d like to put her in my pocket and walk her home on a boardwalk somewhere.

On the other hand she kind of looks like a hybrid between Mandy Moore and Jessica Alba.  And when you have the assistance of the artists at Maxim Magazine, you know you’re in for a good photo shoot.

I guess she’s in like, movies and stuff.  Eh, I don’t know.

More of Kebbel after the jump

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Eric Soler is a Nuyorican (Puerto Rican born and raised in New York) soul brother who likes to say that he knows a bit about fashion and the arts as well as how to entertain! He organizes hosts and promotes parties at nightclubs, lounges and bars all over New York City.

This guy is far from anything soulful.  Whatever parties he promotes I’m sure have a cover charge and this guy has a permanent 5 O’Clock shadow.

But I’m really just pissed at the cover charge thing.  Why do I have to pay money to get into a place where drinks are 15 bucks?

Come on Soler

I’m not sure why drafting Rickie Weeks (albeit in the 18th round), Carlos Delgado, and Vladimir Guerrero would lead me to believe I had any shot at a title this year, but clearly I must have been and still am delusional.

It was a nice tease.  A lovely beginning to what could have been a historical season for Dicky Weeks.  It’s a shame.  A damned shame.  If it weren’t for making millions of dollars and the always possibility of steroids I might actually even feel bad for this guy.

But as it stands I have to count on Alberto Callaspo and Felipe Lopez to fill the void?  No.  Now I need to make a trade which will really suck to do.  And it’s only May.

Man I hate fantasy baseball.  Couldn’t the season just end today while I’m still in first?

Bottom line, it’s where we’re headed folks.  And while many disagree strongly with this stuff, and I do too to a large extent, computers are running the show now, and will be even more so within minutes.   So as human interaction lessons, bring in the virtual props, reality that isn’t real, and sex that isn’t “sexy?”

I mean hell, my buddy just sent me a link to some site that advertises for a “sucking” machine if you catch my drift.  Robotic sex is becoming more real as is computer imagery of attractive women.  Take a look at that picture up top.  Does that look like computer graphics to you?

Well it is.  So as I wait for my first robot sex slave, in the mean time I can look at CG chicks and not feel bad about it.  Trust me, these girls are hot.

Enjoy the gallery

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