I would just like to wish everyone out there a very happy Earth Day!  And I also want to give a shout out to all the insane environmentalists out there who are driving gas powered cars and taking diesel fueled boats out on “environmental” expeditions.  Also, a recognition to all you vegan folks out there who are using up energy on 4 hour phone calls as well as using hair spray and make ups that are killing the Ozone.

Let’s face it.  We’re consumers.  If you all REALLY cared then you’d live in the wilderness eating animals (although if you’re a PETA person scratch that), or shrubs and be naked.

OK, I really do believe in having a cleaner environment but let’s just leave it at that.  Doesn’t mean I’ll stop eating steak or filling my car up with gas.

So in the spirit of Earth Day, here are some fun pictures of oil spills

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I’m not quite sure if I came up with this phrase but I’d like to take credit for it because I’ve never heard it before:  “It’s all the same between the sheets.”  And the moral in that phrase is quite simple.  I don’t care if the girl has blue hair, fishnets, and boots up to her ass (OK that’s kind of hot), when the clothes come off and the lights are out, we’re all human.

So despite how much I disrespect the emo culture, more because of their laziness than anything else, it doesn’t mean there aren’t attractive girls out there sporting these ridiculous looks.

Attractive women are everywhere.  And they’re even in messed up metal bars and cult meetings at 3AM in the middle of the village.  But remember kids, it’s all the same under those sheets.

Here are some pictures of hot emo chicks if you’re into that sort of thing

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As you all know I take some serious pride in making fun of total jackasses.  Any newcomers here can see the rants in the Myspace Toolbox archives.  But don’t these guys deserve it?  There’s just so much trash out there that it’s really disgusting and the bottom line is that we need to clean it up.

So I’ve gone around, looked at my archives as well as those from Hot Chicks with Douchebags and Big Stupid Idiot to find 10 types of guys that just shouldn’t exist.  These are the types that have to realize that they’re “that guy.”  And if they don’t, I’m pointing it out.

Also for anyone thinking I copied this article?  I’ve been writing the Myspace Toolbox for over a year.  Screw yourselves.

Pictures and descriptions after the jump

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Click on the photo for more of this stuff

Well what’s the good word team?  I don’t have much to say this morning other than I’m still tired, still pissed, and overall run down.  It’s just par for the course.  Why does the show 24 have to suck so badly?  It really had a solid start don’t you think?  And why is the Office not funny anymore?  I’m just all kinds of bad right now.

For more bad go to Uncoached’s Facebook Group

Or you can follow me on Twitter

The Wash

Shaquille O’Neal not amused by Oprah – [OMG Blog]

Top twelve signs you are whipped – [On205th]

Isla Fisher is now considered a MILF, and a good one – [Holytaco]

Britney Spears sporting some major boobage – [The Grumpiest]

New Uniforms still make Detroit Lions losers – [Withleather]

37-Year-Old hot lingerie model Caprice Bourret – [Funtasticus]

Gisele Bundchen does a sexy dance – [Barstoolsports]

Nothing like a porn star to brighten up your day – [Flisted]

What the hell happened to Ashley Judd? – [Cityrag]

Ashley Gellar is the latest Hometown Hottie – [NS4W]

A video about legalizing shrooms – [Collegehumor]

The 2009 Miami Dolphins Cheerleader Finals – [Don Chavez]

The USC Song girls go swimming – [Gunaxin]

The nuttiest squirrel picture you’ll ever see – [Blog of Hilarity]

Would you pay to watch this woman have sex? – [1530 Homer]

Daniela Pestova on the cover of GQ – [Saltymilk]

Bride and Bridesmaids show off hot panties – [Humorpass]

The Rise and Fall of Pamela Anderson – [Celebrity Odor]

This is the Best John Mayer fan ever – [Spike]

Click on the photo for more Lea Viglione

I have to say that I disagree with my buddies over at COED Magazine.  They crowned Lea Viglione Miss COED of March 2009.  I’m sorry but you gave her the nod over Laura Leigh?  This is completely unacceptable.  I’m not taking anything away from Lea but come on guys, get your acts together.

More Miss COED types at Uncoached’s Facebook Group

Enjoy the rest of the portfolio

Forget the smile, wagging tail and panting tongue. Once the pile of fur at your feet hears about Waterloo, Australia’s luxury dog retreat, that damp tennis ball and novelty squeaking hot dog won’t cut it anymore.

Part kennel, doggy day care, grooming facility and training classroom, PawPaws has everything you didn’t know mutts want.

First of all, I never had respect for people that treat their dogs like humans.  I think it’s almost like some sort of sick disease.  Don’t get me wrong, dogs are awesome.  But come on!  Speaking to them in these baby tongues?  And making them wear sweaters and shoes?  What the hell is with this sub culture?

And now they have these luxury dog boarding houses?  Given the economy I don’t understand how any government could even let anyone get away with this.  People are losing their jobs by the thousands and you’ve got poodles in day spas.

Do the poodles really know the difference between a bubble bath and a hose down?  They’re animals dammit.  Why not just give the male dogs a happy ending from the massage and call it a day?

These pictures make me sick

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Something tells me that this video won’t be mentioned in any of the “viral videos of the year” awards.  We all know people whore themselves out on Youtube but come on kid.  The least you could do is down a bottle of Jack or something.

I mean at least that Dentist kid’s dad knew his son was all drugged up before filming.  You’re just a jackass playing air guitar and making spitting noises.

Man am I just an angry person or what?

Whatever they put in the water in Argentina is a magical mineral that must alter the face of their women to make them just about flawless.  And there aren’t too many flaws in Rocio Guirao Diaz, a model who hails from this beloved country.

You may have seen her on the Argentine version of Dancing with the Stars, or you may not have.  Well hey, I know that if I had that channel I would certainly give it a shot over my normal scheduled programming of the WNBA.

In any event Rocio is quite rocious (I can’t believe that’s a real word, it’s not actually) and I’d really like to Guirao her Diaz.

More of Rocio after the jump

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OK.  I think I’ve come up with a solution to all of this.  We take guys like our subject Killer Pimp here and have something I’d like to call “The Douchebag Olympics.”

Howard Stern, are you reading this?  One of the events would clearly be the “skinny guy mirror pose” which I fully believe Mr. Pimp would win.  Do these guys even realize how skinny they are?

The only muscle that is showing is bone.

Killah!