So Bello has the term “Italian Parts Made in America” on his profile.  Only he writes it  “iTaLiAn PaRtS mAdE iN aMeRiCa”

So as if this picture above isn’t reason enough to want to beat this guy with the exact same bat he claims to beat up other people with, there’s the whole grammar thing to contend with.

I really have no patience to even write right now.  This is despicable.

Bello oh Bello

Nope.  I’m not talking about celebrities that have tattoos.  I’m talking about psycho people that must have an obsession so great they decided to permanently mark their favorite celebrity on their body.  Man, you’ve got to be serious nut job to consider getting Weird Al Yankovic on your leg.

I mean aren’t there better tattoos out there than the face of Napoleon Dynamite?  Then again, if it weren’t for insane people like that, then I’d really have no material to write about now would I.

So this is a shout out to all the losers out there that have zero identity and try and make a life out of people saying to them “dude, are you just a moron or what?  What the hell is Pee Wee Herman doing tattooed on your arm?”

Here are 15 amazing tattoos of celebrities

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There are people with time on their hands.  And then there are people with time on their hands.  I’m the kind of person with time on my hands that I’ll dedicate over an hour to finding the hottest chicks in a given year for a certain men’s magazine.  I’ll even take over an hour to research a top 15 list of very obscure movie moments that most people don’t think of.

But when I see people researching well over 500 pictures of Christian Bale and Kermit the Frog, then I realize that I’m much more sane than I had originally thought.   You really gotta hand it to this dude for doing the research.

Now in this post, this guy put in about 200 pictures.  I’ve decided to slim it down to the best 15 similarity pictures.  This is just weirdness, period.

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Click on the photo for the hottest of January

So many hotties, and so little time.  It’s a problem that all of us web guys face.  My goals are quite clear.  I try and post women that I’ve never and hopefully you’ve never heard of before.  Don’t get me wrong though.  It’s not like Lucy Pinder types don’t make it up here.  But thanks to COED for making it a contest.

For more contest worthy girls check out Uncoached’s Facebook Group

The Showdown

Caption This:  The Sorriest looking duo ever – [Doubleviking]

Chanelle Hayes knows how to tease me – [Holytaco]

A 19-Year-Old Naked Playboy Model – [Bustedcoverage]

One of the best beach catfights around – [Totallycrap]

The world’s sexiest woman give Valentine’s tips – [Asylum]

Amanda Bynes loves to show off those legs – [Celebrityodor]

A very interesting Q&A with Derek Jeter – [Extramustard]

The Top 10 Old School Arcade games – [Spike]

Cleavage, Kittens, Tasers, and Chuck Norris – [Atom]

High Street Honey of the week – [FHM]

202 Hottest WWE Divas of all time – [Manofest]

A nice little strip tease for Valentine’s Day – [Luckywarrior]

World’s First Glass Topped Pool Table – [The Bachelor Guy]

20 Interesting Watermelon Carvings – [Oddee]

Look into my eyes (While I masturbate) – [Attuworld]

Completely drugged out kid after the dentist – [Flabber]

A whole mess of fun stuff to read – [Other Crap]

10 Playmates you might not want to sleep with – [Whipitoutcomedy]

Click on the photo for more Tebow and ladies

Thanks to my man J-Koot over at Bustedcoverage, we are able to uncover the latest pictures of NCAA football stud Tim Tebow partying with a batch of bikini girls who would do anything to score a touchdown with the Florida quarterback.  I’d love for them to cheer me on.

For more bikini girls check out Uncoached’s Facebook group

Enjoy the rest of the portfolio

Choosing a child’s name has more of an impact than one could imagine.  I mean you’ve got your obvious ones like “Hitler.” Naming your kid Hitler or even Rasputin for that matter probably doesn’t set your kid up to have a promising future.

But then there’s those people that name their kids with names that they seem to think are awesome.  Maybe the names are trendy or evoke some kind of “coolness.”

Well I’m here to set the record straight.  Some names just don’t cut it.  And no matter how cool the person is, I’ll just never buy it.  If you have these names, there’s no chance we’ll ever make it as friends.

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For some reason since the age of 15 I’ve loved dance music.  And I’m specifically talking about Progressive Trance.  Unfortunately the only other people that like this wear really orange puffy pants and sunglasses where the lenses are blue.

While I wasn’t on ecstasy and drinking 6 gallons of water, I was actually dancing to this stuff in all the New York Clubs.  But I’m telling you, when the bass is up and you’ve got the headphones on, this music rules.

And there’s no better way to start a person off than with DJ Tiesto.  That or Paul Oakenfold’s Tranceport.

For those of you who watched the Superbowl, wonderful!  It was another year in a long set of years.  The only reason I bring up the game is just in case you didn’t remember something.  You see, Playboy decided to cancel their Superbowl party this year.

And instead, who stepped up to the plate?  That’s right, it was Penthouse.   At their very own Club Tampa, a VIP bash for the Superbowl was hosted by none other than 2009 Pet of the Year Taya Parker, who is slowly becoming my favorite woman in the world.

Well that’s until tomorrow when I find another girl to post up here.  But Taya?  When I have an Uncoached VIP bash consisting of me and well…you, I shall give you a call.

More of her Parker’s after the jump

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I have no idea where that tag line came from.  And for the love of God I have no idea why this not particularly ripped loser flexes in every picture, but if it weren’t for tools like this I wouldn’t be making a living.

Yeah, that’s right.  My favorite comments are the guys that say “get a life you loser.”  To that I respond.

How about making a living where you get to scroll around the internet all day posting hot chicks and making fun of total tools like said subjects that comment to me?

Might make you want to think again there Cheech.

Smoke?