And yes, I met my woman on J-Date.  You got a problem with that?

Yes it’s true.  In less than four months your humble narrator is taking the plunge.  I mean if I were reading this site I’d probably think that the author never even had sex let alone is getting married.  Well I guess the first part is going to become true eventually right?

In any event, in case you folks out there ever decide to get married, there’s one part that I just stay away from entirely:  The wedding cake.  I’m not a dessert man myself, so I couldn’t care less what our cake looks like.  Although, I must say it’d be pretty damn fun to throw my little fiancé completely offguard with a specialty cake.

And if I were to do just that, here are 15 cakes that I know she wouldn’t approve of.

By the way, the “Happy Birthday Emma” one is there on purpose.  I mean imagine I gave my wife a wedding cake with Tom Selleck on it (or it could be Von Kaiser from Mike Tyson’s Punch Out) that says “Happy Birthday Emma.”  Pretty ballsy I’d say.